TL;DR
Get health and wellness essentials delivered free with Prime
- Fast, free delivery on millions of items
- Prime Video, Amazon Music and more included
- Member-only deals all year
A Sixty and Me first-person essay recommends reconsidering “I’ll try,” “can’t,” “always,” “never,” “if only” and “but.” The piece presents these as personal communication habits that may affect motivation and relationships, not as words readers are medically or universally required to avoid.
Sixty and Me has published a first-person essay recommending that readers reconsider six everyday words and phrases—“I’ll try,” “can’t,” “always,” “never,” “if only” and “but”—because the author says habitual language can shape self-talk, motivation and relationships. The article offers personal examples and suggested alternatives; it does not present research establishing that these words should never be used.
The essay’s author connects the argument to a workshop on limiting beliefs and an affirmation partner with whom she spoke most mornings for seven years. She says changing the language they used helped both make progress in their personal and professional lives. The article also opens with a story about a friend whose fiancé removed the word “divorce” from his dictionaries as a gesture of reassurance; the couple, the writer says, are still married more than 40 years later.
For “I’ll try,” the writer describes her son Joel’s efforts to lose weight and maintain healthier routines. She says daily walks and changes to food and drink at home helped him lose 35 pounds in six months during the pandemic. In conversations about maintaining those practices, Joel would say, “I’ll try”; his mother argues that “I will” expresses greater commitment. That is her interpretation of the phrase, rather than evidence that one wording guarantees a result.
The remaining suggestions concern “can’t,” “always” and “never,” which the writer says can obscure choices or make setbacks sound permanent. She proposes replacing “if only” with language focused on what can be done in the present. She calls “but” a “verbal eraser,” offering “This one is a handful AND I love him to pieces” as a warmer alternative to a sentence that places praise before a qualification.
How Word Choices Shape Conversations
The essay matters as practical commentary on self-talk and communication, particularly for readers seeking ways to speak more deliberately with family, colleagues or themselves. Its examples show how absolute terms such as “always” and “never” can turn a specific frustration into a sweeping judgment, while “but” can make a compliment or apology sound qualified.
At the same time, the recommendations are the author’s perspective, not a universal rule that the listed words are harmful in every situation. “Can’t,” for example, may describe a real limit, and “but” can be useful for accurately expressing contrast. The article’s value lies in prompting readers to notice whether familiar expressions communicate what they intend—not in treating ordinary words as inherently damaging.
Products Worth Considering
Oral-B iO Series 3 Rechargeable Electric Toothbrush for Adults, Black
Philips Sonicare 5950 Rechargeable Electric Toothbrush with 2 Brush Heads, Pink
Garmin Forerunner 165 GPS Running Smartwatch, 43 mm, Black
As an affiliate, we earn on qualifying purchases.
The Essay’s Personal Examples
The source is a personal essay on Sixty and Me, not a reported study or formal language guide. The author frames her advice around intentional living and describes using affirmations with a coaching-class colleague over a period of seven years. Those details explain the origin of her views but do not establish that the same approach will produce the same outcomes for others.
Her family stories provide the article’s central illustrations: a fiancé’s dictionary gesture, her son’s weight-loss experience and a grandson learning to read. The essay also discusses avoiding swear words, but its list of six additional expressions focuses on phrases the writer believes may inhibit accountability, optimism or constructive conversation. The source material provides no publication date or external expert response.
““I’ll try.””
— The essay’s author, describing her son’s response
Limits of the Advice
The source does not cite research or outside experts to establish that avoiding these words improves motivation, health or relationships. Joel’s reported weight loss and changes in wellbeing are presented as a family account; the article does not provide independent medical information or establish that language changes caused those outcomes.
It is also unclear whether the author intends the list as a strict ban or as a prompt for reflection. Her examples suggest that meaning depends on context: a person may need “can’t” to describe an actual constraint, while “but” may be necessary to explain a genuine distinction. The supplied material does not include a publication date, reader data or a response from communication researchers.
Readers Decide What to Replace
The essay offers no announced follow-up study, program or event. Its proposed next step is personal: notice which expressions recur in one’s own speech or thoughts, then try alternatives that more accurately express a choice, a limit or an intention. The author suggests language such as “I will” in place of “I’ll try,” and “since this is here, I have a new opportunity” in place of “if only.”
Whether those substitutions are useful will depend on the speaker and situation. Readers can treat the list as a set of prompts rather than fixed rules, checking whether a replacement makes a statement clearer and more honest. No further evidence or development is identified in the source.
Key Questions
Which six words or phrases does the essay recommend reconsidering?
It lists “I’ll try,” “can’t,” “always,” “never,” “if only” and “but.” The writer presents them as expressions to examine, not as words that must be banned in every circumstance.
Does the essay prove that these words harm relationships or motivation?
No. It is a personal essay based on the author’s experiences and interpretations. The supplied source does not cite research proving that avoiding the phrases produces particular outcomes.
She encourages her son to say “I will” when he intends to follow through. This is the author’s approach to expressing commitment; it does not guarantee success.
Why does the writer object to “always” and “never”?
She says these words can make a problem sound permanent or turn a specific complaint into a broad accusation. For instance, she contrasts a statement about someone who “always” leaves dishes out with addressing the behavior more specifically.
Source: sixtyandme.com
